Dog Health Questions: Do you and your spouse disagree about training?

Do you and your spouse/significant other disagree about dog training methods and general care of the pets? My husband seems to approach things a little more impatiently than I do and I frequently tell him that it makes me uncomfortable, but he gets majorly defensive. For instance, our dog has been able to relieve herself in a certain part of our yard for 6 months now, but he has decided to change this to the corner of the yard. We didn't train her initially to pee in a certain area; she just chose one herself and is VERY consistent about where she does her business...So we've never bothered her. Now my hushand wants to re-sod the lawn and is worried that she'll mess up the grass...so he's training her to go in the back corner of the yard...but he's not doing it slowly. He just took her back there and waited for a long time until she peed (very reluctantly and I think under stress according to the look on her face and her ears). This was also her favorite play spot.

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My husband and I agree on training our dogs, mostly. We are both dog trainers, and we both agree your husband is being unrealistic in his expectations and confusing the dog.

Your opinion about gradually moving the pee spot was right on.

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• My best advice at all such times is get rid of the man and keep the dog. you will be happier!


• Changing the spot is very confusing to the dog, but if you take her there to pee and she does, PRAISE her for it and give her a treat, making it more comfortable. My husband listens to me on training because I'm the one watching the training shows on tv, reading the books and magazines and on the internet finding ways to train. And we don't even have a nother dog yet! but same goes for the cats and our biting parrot. he's a bit impatient, being Italian, but I love him and have to work around that. YOU should take the dog out and show her instead of him and then play in another area. Does that make sense? But you also need to be assertive as well, that's very important. Do you ever watch "dog whisperer" on the National Geographic Channel? It's awesome. What your dealing with is a strong personality. Just stick up for yourself. I've learned to do it, but it can be emotional and that's not good for the doggie either. good luck!


• You and your husband need to be on the same page about dog training. Consistency is important. She's not going to want to pee where she plays, and your husband forcing her to do so is breaking her trust.
  
  Rather than deal with the other behavioral problems that could stem from abrupt retraining (plus the stress in the house between you and your husband over this issue), I'd let the dog pee where she has established her scent marker. Then I'd sit down with my husband and offer to pay to re-sod the pee area should it become damaged.
  
  Chances are, if she remains on the same food and hasn't damaged the yard yet, she probably won't unless she gets a UTI or something.


• Absolutely, we argued over everything from what the commands were to where she would do her business. My husband finally gave in when I told him that I was the one who did the majority of the training and when he told her a different command that meant something else it was only confusing her. However, if your trying to change her spot for peeing. I would do it gradually and when she goes in the new spot praise her for it and possibly give her a treat for going in the new appropriate spot.


• hi my husband listens to me its kinda like the blind leading the blind ,but i am ALWAYS right infact hes the one saying stuff like i am not having him on the sofa and he lets him , hes totally loved up and not with me lol xx


• My husband and I have had many disagreements in the past. But eventually he came around. He knows my dogs come before him, and if he doesn't like it, he can take a hike. He also knows I'm a much better trainer then he is.


• Yeah I dont know what it is about men and dogs but men seem to have these idiotic irrational ideas about training that are utterly stupid.... my brother and I fought all the time about it when he lived here... he taught my dog to play rough, which ended in him being plowed down by my dog and almost severley hurt, he fed them off his plate and then complained when they begged, he got them all excited before walks until they were almost uncontrollable at that time... and GRRRR!! it just made me so mad! I hate having to deal with someone elses idea of dog training its confusing to the dogs and its detrimental. I think that even if 2 people live in the same house it should be agreed upon who will be the dogs sole trainer and who will just be the secondary caregiver. Its just too confusing for all involved to deal with several different ideas of training etc... Your husband like every other man is doing the old "impose the will on the dog" for no real reason... geez he should leave her to go in the spot she was going and just dont re-sod that spot... that would be the smart and logical thing to do.. in fact if he doesnt want her to ruin the grass he should make that spot a dirt patch, it would be better that way. In any case for some reason men do stupid things when it comes to dogs and they dont want to listen when others try and tell them and they get all "defensive" and whiny.. its annoying. My friend also had the same problem with her BF and their dogs, I had it with my brother and my BF and its sooo stressful and annoying for the dogs and you. I am so happy now to have nobody else living here but me and so are my dogs... they dont get mixed signals anymore. I think you need to sit down with your hubby and make an agreement about who trains the dog, and who doesnt.. that way there will be no confusion for the poor dog!


• Your husband is confusing your dog. Confusion can lead to anxiety, which can lead to behavioral problems.
  
  He should have thought about that before he got a dog and before she trained herself to go in one part of the yard. Tell your husband he is very lucky she does that and to leave well enought alone.
  
  Men, you can't live with them, you can't bury them in the backyard without the dogs digging them up.