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Maybe you have switched and changed and tried too many things which will make her anxious...it is a submissive behaviour issue and can be helped by building her confidence...take a look on this website as it explains it and also use the NILIF (same website) http://k9aro.webs.com/behaviour.htm
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- You might want to ask the vet, but here's a trick i used with my dog:
When they start peeing carry them outside, soon enough they will realize that they need to go pee outside. I might sound nasty but it really worked. But also if he's that old you might want to just talk to the vet. - It seems like you've made plenty of mistakes already with all the stuff you've tried. You should never comfort a submissive dog and you sure as hell should never yell at one. Submissive behavior should always be ignored completely. Comforting her in this state makes it worse because then she associates submissive behavior with positive attention. You're almost encouraging her to be scared at that point. Yelling at submissive behavior is extremely stressful and confusing. When a dog pees or rolls on their back or avoids eye contact, they're saying, "Just ignore me, you're the boss. I respect you, please don't hurt me...etc" So when you yell, you're dog has NO idea what else it could possibly do to please you, so of course she just gets even MORE scared and stressed out. Bottom line to keep in mind: NEVER reward OR punish submissiveness.
It's very odd that this behavior would start out of the blue when she's 3 1/2 years old. Not to accuse anyone of anything, but are you SURE she was never abused in ANY way? Even an accident (someone tripping over her, dropping something noisy, shouting..etc) could trigger such a drastic change in behavior. It is very highly unlikely that she would just start for no reason.
I would analyze exactly WHEN this behavior happens. Does it tend to happen around a certain time each day? Do particular situations trigger her stress? (Loud noises, new people, playtime...etc) Have their been any household changes in the last 6 months? (ie. new pet introduced, different schedule, new location..etc) Is she submissively peeing around everyone or only certain people/person? Answering these questions could help with the recovery process. It's very important to know what is upsetting her and how to appropriately avoid it.
The real underlying issue behind submissive peeing is always a lack of confidence. Confident dogs do not get nervous enough to submissively pee. Your dog is either confused or stressed about where she fits into the "pack" at this point, so you need to build her self-esteem and assure her that she is doing things that please you. Since you said that sometimes playing causes the peeing, try to tone down the play. Take her for a walk instead or hold a bone for her to chew. It would be helpful for you to just let her play at her own pace. Don't force any particular playing on her, and if/when she pees, just stop and ignore her completely. You also mentioned eye contact, which I'm sure you know can be very threatening in the animal world. She may not understand that you're just looking at her. For now, it would be best to avoid all eye contact until she's feeling more secure.
Also, start to hand-feed her. It might be hard for her at first, but it's a great way to build self-esteem and trust. You can sit or lay on the floor and simply hold food in your hand for her. Do not make eye-contact, do not use coddling words, just hold it for her and slowly feed her. She may not be willing at first, so don't rush her, but eventually, it will be helpful. You can also work with treats (be sure they're something special and enticing; not her usual treats) such as boiled chicken. When you're around her and she is behaving calmly, do not talk to her or say anything, but simply drop the treats for her. It will help her create a positive association with you. Eventually, you can hand-feed the treats as well. Everyone who comes in contact with her or stresses her out should be on-board with AT LEAST the treating part of training.
Keep in mind that whatever she is most scared of or upset about should NOT be forced. Dogs are not trained like other animals or people through desensitization processes. You really need to let dogs learn trust for themselves, so it's best to never force a fearful situation. Be sure to ONLY ever reward confident and calm behavior and ignore stressful and nervous behavior. If she starts to act that way, simply walk away and ignore her. Do not acknowledge any peeing, just be sure to clean it with a cleaner specifically for dogs. Otherwise, she will continually smell her own pee and it will stress her out more. Obedience training would also be a very helpful activity. Performing acts that please you are a great way to boost your dog's morale. Even simple commands such as 'sit', 'stay' or 'leave it' are healthy to practice with treats to encourage her. If she doesn't know any commands though, now may not be the best time to start. It would only cause more stress for her if she didn't know what you wanted.
Please be patient with her. Submissive behavior is much more difficult and confusing to her than it is to you. She's ultimately just trying to please you and to fit in with the family. Just take it slow and be sure to always reward confident behavior with a calm praise or a treat. Don't make a big deal out of anything, just try to stay calm and relaxed around her. She just needs to learn to trust you again.
Best luck - Hey there,
Have you considered a bladder infection or some sort of health issue? What type of dog is it? Certain breeds tend to have specific traits and this could be one of them.
When your dog pees, what I would suggest is right after - taking her outside and showing her where to go. Rienforce the training aspect of going outside. Perhaps she's scared for some reason... it doesn't mean it's from abuse but fear of you leaving again when you come home?
It's weird and sad because the poor things can't talk to us. Breaks my heart.
Also, not sure if you knew this but... looking a dog in the eyes can mean two things to them:
1. A challenge. Some dogs get stared at in the eyes and try and fight and become aggressive
2. They're in trouble.
Be careful. Stick to one way of dealing with this instead of multiple ones. Dogs NEED structure and it needs to be consistent.
Hope that helps :)
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